Happy.

This morning when I woke up, the first thought I had as I pulled the covers back and stretched out my arms was how excited I was for a new day. That this day, and each one, was so full of possibilities...I was hopeful for all the fun the new day might bring. 

One of the reasons I started this blog up again is because this is a very exciting time in our lives with Stace finishing up his PhD and applying for jobs. I wanted to document it. But now as we're in the thick of it all, and since nothing is certain (we are in a constant state of limbo!), I feel sharing anything publicly might jinx it all. ;)  I don't know where we will end up. I don't know what the future will bring. I don't know if we'll know where Stace is going to start his career this month, next month, or six months from now. (Gasp! Could it be longer than that?!😳) But what I do know is that I am so happy. I am so grateful. I know we will go where we are supposed to go. I know Stace has done everything he can, and that it's in the Lord's hands. So now as I strive to not let my nerves get too wracked over it all, I hold onto the sweet peace and assurance that comes from knowing He will guide our lives with His gentle hand. He's proven me time and again that His thoughts and plans are far-and-away better than my own (Isaiah 55:8). 

Tonight as I said my prayers I thanked my Father in Heaven for this life He has given me (yes, I'm typing this post on my phone in bed😉). Of course it's not without it's challenges, but I really love it. I could not ask for more. I love my family. I love my husband so much. He is such a good and unpretentious man. He's humble and hardworking and he makes me laugh. Plus he's cute (added bonus😉). He inspires me to be better. I love my children- I love the things they say and how they say them, they're soft little faces, contagious laughter, and happy spirits. Though being a mom is the hardest thing I've ever done in so many ways, my children fill me with an indescribebable joy I've never experienced whie doing anything else besides being their mother. So often I feel I don't deserve the great blessings they are in my life, but I am so grateful they are mine and that I get to cuddle them and kiss their fabulously squishy cheeks each and every day. 

This life is so good and though I don't know much about were it will lead us, I wouldn't trade it for anything. I am so grateful. 

On My Mind...

Read this scripture this morning.  Sometimes it's good to write it out to aid in internalizing the words. I am loving these verses, especially at this time in our lives.

(This is King Benjamin speaking in the Book of Mormon.)

Mosiah 2:20-25:
20. "I say unto you, my brethren, that if you should render all the thanks and praise which your whole soul has power to possess, to that God who has created you, and has kept and preserved you, and has caused that ye should rejoice, and has granted that ye should live in peace one with another--"
21. "I say unto you that if ye should serve him who has created you from the beginning, and is preserving you from day to day, by lending you breath, that ye may live and move and do according to your own will, and even supporting you from one moment to another-- I say, if ye should serve him with all your whole souls yet ye would be unprofitable servants."
22. "And behold, all that he requires of you is that you keep his commandments; and he has promised you that if ye would keep his commandments ye should prosper in the land; and he never doth vary from that which he hath said; therefore, if ye do keep his commandments he doth bless you and prosper you."
23. "And now, in the first place, he hath created you, and granted unto you your lives, for which ye are indebted unto him."
24. "And secondly, he doth require that ye should do as he hath commanded you; for which if ye do, he doth immediately bless you; and therefore he hath paid you. And ye are still indebted unto him, and are, and will be, forever and ever; therefore, of what have ye to boast?
25. "And now, I ask, can ye say aught of yourselves? I answer you, Nay. Ye cannot say that ye are even as much as the dust of the earth; yet ye were created of the dust of the earth; but behold, it belongeth to him who created you."

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin (1917–2008) of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles taught that we should spend all our days in pursuit of eternal life as a means of showing gratitude for the debt Jesus Christ paid on our behalf:

• “How can we ever repay the debt we owe to the Savior? He paid a debt He did not owe to free us from a debt we can never pay. Because of Him we will live forever. Because of His infinite Atonement, our sins can be swept away, allowing us to experience the greatest of all the gifts of God: eternal life."
  
  

"An Army of Ella Graces"

It has been over a month since Ella Grace's 2nd birthday and I still have not written this poor child's 2nd year post. I am ashamed!  I am finding it an overwhelming task. She is too perfect/ hilarious/ adorable/ happy/ sweet/ crazy/ fun/ wild for me to sum her up in a blog post. Stace says he wants "50 Ella Graces" or an army of "Ella Graces". He also says he can't stand it when he hears this song because he can't help but think of our precious girl. I think a few tears may have fallen the first time he heard it...

The way she talks. The way she sings. The way she dances (and says "I'm dencing!") The way she gets excited about things. We need a video camera attached to the front of this girl at all times. She is more of a sunshine in our lives than we could have ever have possibly imagined. We love her SO MUCH!!!!!

 The eating-mommy's-face-off- type of kisses that she loves to do so much;)

Her Ariel obsession is alive and well!

 A girl after her mother's heart... ;) (where's her diet coke?)

 Oh these two...he's obsessed:)

 In her 18-24 month Janie and Jack skirt my sister got her for her birthday. HA!

 I used the adjustable waist all the way, but it still was a struggle to keep it up!

 She LOVES going to her brother's soccer games!

She thought this was the best thing ever!

 I'm sure she was singing "...part of your worrrllllddd!

She loves her sunglasses!

 She loves animals!

And is she ever quite the little artist!

 She loves to play in her room! (which was very messy when this pic was taken...ha!)

 And I just love this shot of her first little pony!

Her post...it's coming as soon as I get up the gumption and courage to sit down and tackle the beast that will be that post!

Thoughts on "House Dreaming"

I call it "house dreaming" because we are not "house hunting" yet. The main reason being that we don't know yet where we will be living next year! However, as Stace has been receiving calls for interviews over the last few weeks, I have enjoyed popping on over to Zillow.com to see what the homes are like in that area.  Some of you might know that I absolutely LOVE home design and decor.  Interior Design was my original major in college, but then I switched to Eduction, then Public Relations (I'm really decisive...).  I just have so much fun thinking about and creating pretty spaces!  Now, how good I am at it is another topic, but I enjoy it nonetheless! :)

As I have perused photos of homes and home plans, here are a few thoughts that have come to mind:

1. "No one needs a 14,000 square foot house!"  When I saw the square footage of a house I thought was pretty, I literally laughed!  (Note: it didn't look nearly that big...maybe it was a typo?) But really, if you want a 14,000 square foot house, good for you! I just thought it was funny this house appealed to me, and then I saw the size...haha!

2. "Nothing is as annoying as an overly-decorated house when I just want to see the house!" (That is not true;). It's hard to look past all that stuff to see the bones of the house and imagine your own family in it.

3.  "Wow, that's a really nice picture of your bed!" It's silly to have a large-enough room to stand back and get a good photo of, yet the photographer zeroes in on the bed. I'm not interested in purchasing your bed, silly!

4. "If Stace ends up with a job in NYC, I'm really going to love my 500 square foot apartment." ;D
 (What an adventure that would be!)

And finally, here is a cute little link sure to give you a laugh a friend posted on her Facebook today.

Note: I think all of these rooms are crazy-beautiful! Functional and realistic for children? No way! But pretty, indeed! I think there is a balance that can be struck, for sure:)

"A Jesus Song!"..."small" victories

On Monday when I planned Family Home Evening, I took a break from the usual lessons we've been doing lately, which often are about how choices have consequences, or about being kind to each other; I just wanted to talk about Jesus and his love. We used a lesson from the LDS.org FHE site where we turned the lights out and asked Julian to do simple tasks ("find Chicka Chicka ABC off your bookshelf for us!"), he told us he couldn't do it, we asked him why, "because the lights are off"...then we turned them on and asked him to try his tasks again, which he did with ease.  We talked about how that light was just like Jesus. Jesus is the light in our lives, and that light enables us to see and do the things we need to do in our lives that will bring us joy (let me tell you...Chicka Chicka ABC has brought Julian joy since he was a tiny baby. It never gets old to him). Then we sat down and showed pretty paintings depicting the Savior (from this book) as Stace and I shared our feelings about him.  The spirit was sweet. At the end of the night as we were eating our treats, I asked him "Julian, what did the light represent in our little game?" and he promptly and confidently said "Jesus!" Yes! I did not know if that question would be too hard, especially because I had used the word "represent." Stace and I exchanged looks which would translate to high-fives had they been gestures instead of looks. I just wanted to talk about Jesus for FHE. No if-thens. No warnings. No "be nice" sermons. No-every-action-has-an-equal-or-opposite-reaction. Just Jesus. It was needed.

Last night before I went to bed, I read this talk by Elder Richard G. Scott given last April called "For Peace at Home." It really meant a lot to me as I read it. (An excerpt from the talk: "One of the greatest blessings we can offer to the world is the power of a Christ-centered home where the gospel is taught, covenants are kept, and love abounds.") It's interesting how in different seasons of our lives, certain General Conference talks carry more personal meaning than they do at other points. I'm so grateful that there is always inspired counsel, no matter what is on your mind and heart.

Today before lunch, the kids and I folded our arms to say a prayer. With the words of Elder Scott still fresh in my mind, the only thing I prayed for aside from a blessing on the food was an added measure of Christ's love in our hearts and home. I asked Heavenly Father to help the children know how much Jesus loves them, and asked Him to help their love for our Savior grow. I asked Him to help us remember how much Jesus loves everyone, and for us to try and follow that example.

After lunch nap time soon rolled around.  After reading Julian The Little Old Lady Who Was Not Afraid of Anything I turned out the light and asked him if he wanted me to sing him a song. He quickly and perhaps out of habit said "the Thomas song." I started singing "they're two, they're four, they're six, they're eight..." when he interrupted me, head still on the pillow, and with a smile on his face said "no a Jesus song!" Then he lifted his head up and still smiling said "a Jesus song! A Jesus song!"

Y'all don't know how long I've waited to hear him request that.  Well, it's the first time he's ever requested that:)

I think the sweet feeling in our home today at nap time was strengthened by yesterday's.  Julian will often put up a fight when it comes time for naps. (Both of my children are quite strong-willed...fyi.) I have recently more fully learned of the power that can come from quick, silent prayers said with faith in our hearts in our moments of need. Yesterday as Julian put up his usual whining plea to not have to go down for a nap, I silently plead with Heavenly Father to please help me handle this the way He would. The exasperated way I would has proven plenty to not work. I have learned in my short time as a mother that I absolutely can.not. do this alone...I cannot do it without His help. Perhaps this is a lesson we learn more and more as we grow older: doing anything without His love is never as effective as when done with it. I plead with Him in that moment to help Julian be calm and compliant. And it was miraculous. It was the most beautiful, drama-free pre-nap time routine I've experienced with him in a quite a long time. My prayer was answered.

We try to do the things regularly that we know will bring the peace of the Gospel into our home.  But The Lord taught me an important lesson this week from an admittedly small thing. Doing family home evenings, reading scriptures together, and having family prayers...those are all good things! But we don't do them to merely "teach a lesson" or to simply cross it off the list of things we know we should do. It's not until we let the Spirit of why we should do it...the Spirit of Christ and his love, truly permeate the things we say and do in our home, will it prove to be truly effective.

Upon his "Jesus song!" request, I sang "I'm trying to be like Jesus." It's one of my very favorites (so much so that I used the lines of the chorus as my senior quote. I just googled it to share a link... apparently it's one of David Archuleta's favorites too;). I smiled the whole time as I sang, as tears gathered a bit in my eyes. Julian saw me smiling and he was smiling too as he had his head on his pillow and his eyes closed. I walked out of the room after telling him I love him, and as soon I closed the door, I knelt and said a prayer of gratitude.

I am so grateful for the Spirit of Christ.  And I am learning a lot from the sweet, gentle, yet powerful love it can bring into our home.

Senior yearbook photo & quote            This 3-year-old was quiet like this during all 8 hours of GC;D

Happy today after filling up his "poofball bank" with 10 for the first time! He subsequently got to go to the treasure box:)

Speechless

When I look back through the posts I have made on this blog in the future, I want to remember these feelings I'm having right now at this time in my life. The problem is, words fail me. I can't even begin to put into words the gratitude I feel, and I can't even touch being able to describe the tender mercies and blessings that have come to pass over the last week. My heart is so full, and I am so grateful.  I think I will try and describe what has happened in an actual journal, as I feel certain things are just too sacred to share with the world. (No, I'm not pregnant;) But I want my future self to look on this time with sweet nostalgia and to remember how I felt that my heart may burst with the awareness that my Heavenly Father does know me and He loves me.

Tonight in Target I saw a journal with a quote on it that I truly loved...and how true that quote is:

This is what I know, and I pray that this knowledge will just grow brighter and brighter until the perfect day (D&C 24:50): I know that God lives. I know that He loves His children.  I know that He is in the the very details of our lives...our daily lives. And we can feel His gentle, guiding hand more and more in our daily lives as we seek Him more and more.  I know that He cares about what we care about.  Really, really cares. I know He loves us infinitely and that the feeling of His love in our hearts is the best. feeling. ever. I know the Atonement is real, and really powerful...the most powerful force in the world.  It is by this miracle of the Atonement that hearts are changed, and he has continued to change mine time and again. The only explanation is through the power of that Atonement. I am so grateful for forgiveness. I fall, and have fallen, so short so many times in my life. I have failed time and again, and I look back at those times with such disappointment and sadness for hurt I may have ever caused someone. I hate that I have ever done that. And I wish I could wipe that away. I know that the Savior can though. I know that he has. I feel absolutely no malice in my heart right now...I feel so much joy and grattitude...it's indescribable. I am so grateful for the gift of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. As tears stream down my face in silence in this quiet house while my sweet children are sleeping and my sweet husband is working (per usual;), and after such a great blessing has fallen into my lap, I feel so blessed to know what I know about eternity, about God, about families, and about how God loves and sees His children.  We are His work.  He cares for nothing so much as He does helping each of His children return back to live with Him. I am so ready for General Conference. I don't know how much I will get to actually hear this weekend with my two toddling, rambunctious kiddos, but I can't wait to listen to what I might have missed after they are asleep. I am so grateful for what I know.  Words fail me now, and so I will end with this scripture...one of my very favorites:

Therefore, let us glory, yea, we will glory in the Lord; yea, we will rejoice, for our joy is full; yea, we will praise our God forever. Behold, who can glory too much in the Lord? Yea, who can say too much of his great power, and of his mercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men? Behold, I say unto you, I cannot say the smallest part which I feel.

-Alma 26:16

Disney Birthday for Ella Grace!!!

After her super-fun playdate birthday party the day before her birthday, Ella Grace and Daddy played with her new Ariel Barbie her friend Addyson gave her in her new Ariel pj's from her friend Julia!  (This was her first Barbie!  It went over well...)

She was delighted to play Barbies with Daddy;)

And he was soooo delighted to play with her too. (Can we please get more pillows? We clearly don't have enough...thanks, Mom & Jess!)

The day of her actual birthday, we headed down to Disney!!!

(As you can see, this photo op was a bust...)

It was such a chill day.  It was raining when we first pulled up so we were all bummed. However, it stopped after about ten minutes, and there was pretty much no one at Disney that day! It was amazing! This reminds me...I never posted about our last trip to Disney...clear back in July! On the FOURTH of JULY to be exact! Yes, we are the crazy people who went to Disney on Independence Day...along with 75 million other people! Needless to say, this experience was completely different from our last trip to Disney! I need to get to posting about that awesome, albeit claustrophobic, day!

While waiting for Daddy to grab some Fast Passes, a sweet Disney worker let the kids play with her puppet:)

One of our first stops was to one of Julian's favorite rides: the Buzz LightYear Game! Notice his score: he beat all of us...by a lot!

 

This is his "brave soldier face":D

Sorry I'm posting every picture ever taken...I just don't want to forget any moment. I wish I could strap a video camera to a pole ten feet in front of my kids all day err'day.

I have a thing about profiles. I just love them:)

We then stopped to eat our lunch. This was right before I gave Ella Grace nursemaid's elbow. Great start to our Disney day! Good thing Daddy was a doctor in his past life and fixed it right up! 

 One of Julian's favorite things in life is to play jail. So this was a perfect spot for him!

 Next we hit up the Pooh Bear ride! Oh, how she loves this ride! Here we are waiting in line:)

 Insta filtered...love them things;D

There was a zero-minute wait for the Dumbo ride (unheard of!), but we stopped and played in the waiting area anyway because the kids love it!

 I am in love with this series of pictures which depict so well exactly how she felt about being on the Dumbo ride...

...especially this one:)

Disney just opened up a new attraction where you can meet Cinderella, Aurora (who, btw, Ella Grace knew her name when she saw her!  Amazing! She knew from playing her cousin Eileen's Little People Sleeping Beauty toy a month ago. That has been her only introduction to Aurora. She's got a photographic memory when it comes to princesses;), Rapunzel and Tiana. We just met the first two. We'll save the others for next time:)

So, pretty much the cutest thing ever was watching Julian's reaction to the princesses.  Ella Grace wasn't even sure about any of it, but Julian was so adorably bashful, yet ready to give some serious hugs. Yesterday he told Stace and I he was going to "go to the temple and marry a princess. No, all the princesses." Then he said that they're all going to line up for him. (Ha!) I tried to tell him he would get to choose ONE princess, just like Daddy chose one...me! Then he said he was going to choose me, too! ;)

Be still my heart...

When Ella Grace finally decided Cinderella was worthy to talk to her, she initiated their interaction by showing off her shoes.

Y'all, I die...

Gettin' cozy...

Bahaha!!! My sweet boy.

Ella Grace prefers to push and not be pushed.

 I have never had the patience to wait around for a good spot for one of these shows. This was spectacular to not have to "fight" any crowds...we were this close...we just walked up and then the show began! 

We went to Belle's Castle for the first time for her birthday dinner! It is so beautiful!

 

she won't sit on the booster seat if it's set on the chair. Why would she do that?

Trying the grey stuff, per Lumiere's recommendation. It is, indeed, "delicious!"

Touring the castle....going into the "West Wing"

Ella Grace loving the birthday card from all the Disney characters:)

Strollers are put to good use in our family;)

We looked over and saw this as we waited in line to see Ariel. She's so crazy!

You might think she seems less enthusiastic than you'd have guessed she would be...

But she got much more friendly with Ariel than the other princesses!

Ella Grace is all "you are. not. the real Ariel." ;D

"Nope, not buyin' it..."

How can I not post this...look at J's face!

My favorite photo of the day!!! Happiness is being whisked around Disney World like so on your birthday. (PS: this was as we were leaving...after having had no naps all day!)

Yep, she was a happy birthday girl, indeed!

A happy, Minnie Mouse birthday diva...

You'd think this was the last of her birthday posts, but it's not! :D We have memories created from celebrating with Grandmommy, Pop Pop, and Aunt Candace that need to be documented! :)